Newspaper Dicks Of The Day (NSFW)

I just spent half an hour laughing so hard that I hurt myself. From Drawing Dicks On The Herald Sun.

News: Mexican Police Seize Homemade Marijuana Cannon

Gives a whole new meaning to "firing one up." Made from a plastic pipe "and a crude metal tank that used compressed air from ...

Inexplicable Stock Photos Of The Day

Photo not related. To anything. More at Buzzfeed and Awkward Stock Photos.

WTF "Help Wanted" Signs Of The Day

Long-haired freaky people need not apply. Fearful drunks apply within. You can't have all the shits. Six Flags needs some. Sounds like a...

Craigslist Ad Of The Day: Free Weave

best of craigslist > portland >  Free Weave (purple comb included) This alluring weave can be found hanging on a bush on SE Francis S...

Job Query Of The Day: I Would Like To Be Pope

From McSweeney's. I Would Like to Be Pope by John Ortved Dear sir or madam, I am writing to apply for the position of Pope. I recentl...

Vintage STD Propaganda Posters Of The Day

Funny stuff from Hannah and Acid Cow. Interesting (i.e. lame) how women are portrayed as deadly temptresses and ghouls, and the poor soldier...

Dipsh*ts Of The Day: Thieves Steal Hooter's Jukebox Instead Of ATM

From MailOnline. Men caught on CCTV driving truck into Hooters to steal ATM but mistakenly take jukebox instead Jukeboxes are an increasing...

6 Actors Who Have Won Both Oscars And Razzies

As long as we're on the subject of Razzies, here's a nifty little piece from Mental Floss. "The day before the Academy Awards ...

Razzie Award Winners Of The Day

The Oscars weren't the only awards given out yesterday. In its annual counterpoint to the Academy Awards, The Golden Raspberry Award Fo...

News: Man Who Bought 34th Anniversary Reissue Of Fleetwood Mac's 'Rumours' Feeling Like Real Idiot After Passing Display For 35th Anniversary Edition

From The Onion. Man Who Bought 34th Anniversary Reissue Of Fleetwood Mac's 'Rumours' Feeling Like Real Idiot After Passing Disp...

Leaf-Blower Faces Of The Day

The stuff of nightmares. From Tadaocern via TheFW. More here.

News: Domestic Tiff Caused By Man's Ball-Scratching

What? They're not gonna scratch themselves! From The Smoking Gun. Cops: Domestic Tiff Prompted By Man's Scratching FEBRUARY 19--...

Reimagined Pin-Up Girls Of The Day

From Flavorwire: "When artist David Jablow came across Do It Yourself Doodler, a vintage ’60s notepad filled with pages upon pages of t...

The Best Laugh Ever (Of The Day)

Try watching this without laughing yourself. I couldn't. Thanks for the link, Daisy. .

20 Love Songs We Never Want To Hear Again

"We" being Rolling Stone, though I agree with all their choices. CHRIS DE BURGH, "LADY IN RED" It's kind of fitting ...

News: Florida Couple Addicted to Coffee Enemas

They must spend a fortune at Starbutt's. From ABC News. Link from Robert McLeod. Florida Couple Addicted to Coffee Enemas, 100 a Month ...

Punny Business: Stores With Awesomely Bad Pun Names

I don't know if these draw or repel customers, but I'm grateful for the laughs. That's why he was dancing on the ceiling. He nee...

LOTD Classic: 21 Guys Who Look Like Kenny Rogers

From MenWhoLookLikeKennyRogers.com.  Undertaker Kenny Kenny Grinny If You Like Pina Coladas Kenny Kenny Vega$ Kenn-Tucky Malibu Kenny Squirr...

Rare Amusing Insults Of The Day

Because asshole has lost its punch. From Merriam-Webster. LICKSPITTLE Definition: A fawning subordinate; a suck-up Origin: Someone who licks...

Menu Of The Day: Guy's American Kitchen (spoof)

Comedy brilliance. Thanks for the link, Cloe Oliver. Click pic for easier reading.

SNL Movie Trailer Of The Day: DJesus Uncrossed

The H is silent. .

Paula Deen Riding Things (Of The Day)

From the Tumblr blog, y'all! More here. .

21 Unfortunately Named Products Of The Day

Unfortunate unless your goal is brand name recall, in which case, congratulations, you nailed it. Links from Mighty Joe Stankowski. The soun...

Person One Season Ahead In TV Show Doling Out Counsel Like Wise Elder

From The Onion. Guy One Season Ahead In TV Show Doling Out Counsel Like Wise Elder PAWTUCKET, RI—Adopting the sagely demeanor of an all-kn...

14 Things I Will Never Do Again (And You Can't Make Me)

Just sayin'. 1. Take a mud bath at Calistoga (or anywhere else). 2. Tell a cop to "fuck off." 3. Help you move. 4. Give money ...

15 Hilarious Dog GIFs Of The Day

Go, dog, go. From Buzzfeed. You made cupcakes? For ME? I hate cabbage too, dog. I'm beat. Good night. Wampug More here. .

Stupid Ads For Unnecessary Feminine Products Of The Day

Check out these ads for a new Playtex wipes. This is what happens when ad agencies try to get creative with products that don't really n...

News: Woman's Uncontrollable Sex Drive Caused By Rabies

Link from Hannah. Woman's Uncontrollable Sex Drive Caused By Rabies This is a story all about a 28-year-old woman in India who everyone ...

8 Famous People Who Died In The Bathroom

Adding indignity to injury. From HowStuffWorks.com. ELVIS Elvis's addiction to prescription drugs was well known, and on August 16, 1977...

Creepy Vintage Valentines Of The Day

Happy Overpriced Flowers Day! Your gift today is from Daisy. - C If you want to keep someone guessing as to what your true feelings are on...

Star Wars Valentines Of The Day

Dorks need love, too, you know. These were all created by forum readers at SomethingAwful.com.

News: Ke$ha Drinks Her Own Urine

Then regurgitates it in song form. From The New Zealand Herald. (What? It's a newspaper!) Ke$ha drinks own urine in TV series Ke$ha say...

Best Fair Fried Foods Of The Day

I love the state fair for two reasons: 1) Mullets 2) Food It's hard to resist the corn dogs, funnel cakes and caramel apples (with nuts)...

Pretty Girls, Ugly Faces (Of The Day)

A good sense of humor can cover a multitude of ugly. From Reddit. More here.  .

The 30 Worst Albums By Great Bands (Of The Day)

Lists like this tend to stir up emotions, so I will remind you that these are the OPINIONS from writers on the various sites I used (see sou...

News: Song Crafted In The Deepest Pit Of Hell Wins Big At Grammys

From The Onion. Song Crafted In The Deepest Pit Of Hell Wins Big At Grammys LOS ANGELES—A song forged by the Ruler of Darkness himself in t...

Why Tumblr Is Hilarious (Of The Day)

Buzzfeed link from Steph and Dawn. See more here.

Weekend Links Of The Day

Too much good stuff this week. Grammy bans nips, "buttocks," and "puffy genitals" at this year's broadcast. (Evil B...

News: Seahag Gets 30 Years For Moida

Said star witness Popeye, "She filled 'im fulla lead and slaughterized 'im! Uh guh guh guh guh."  From the Miami Herald. ...

Beyonce's Backfired-Request-Turned-Internet-Meme Of The Day

Long story short, after some "unflattering" photos of Beyonce from her Super Bowl performance turned up on a Buzzfeed post, her pu...

Ain't Nobody Got Time For A Toothache!

Check it out. Sweet Brown got a TV spot. Thanks for the link, Lea-Anne Jackson.

Vid Of The Day: Neeson Season

Take the *$%&*% elephant.

Additional Myers-Briggs Personality Types Of The Day

Don't know Myers-Briggs? Here's a brief summary. From McSweeney's. Additional Myers-Briggs Personality Types By James Hannaham...

Meme Of The Day: The Most Interesting Man In The World

Stay funny, my friends.

Creepy-Ass Dog Up For Adoption

I'd be afraid he would talk to me one day out of the blue and I'd shit my pants. From Gawker. Dog With 'Human Face' Lookin...

News: Cop Sting Nets 71yo "Cougar" Prostitute

From The Smoking Gun. Police Sting Nets "Cougar," 71, On Prostitution Rap JANUARY 28--A 71-year-old woman was arrested Friday fo...

LOTD Classic: 21 Celebrities Who Need To Change Their Names

(Originally posted 9/9/09) Everybody's gotta be different now, is that it? Diversity is fine, but give me something I can pronounce....

Best Movie Posters Of 2012

From Flavorwire. Minimalist, bloody without being gory, and blazed into our minds until Christmas day. A delightful, hand-drawn poster by Jo...

1930s Comedian Pretty Sure He's Outsmarted Murphy Bed

From The Onion. 1930s Comedian Pretty Sure He's Outsmarted Murphy Bed Jan. 28, 2013 HOLLYWOOD, CA—Clad in his pajamas, fuzzy slippers, a...

Unhappy Hipsters Of The Day

From a blog called, oddly enough, Unhappy Hipsters. More here. .

Meme Of The Day: Philosoraptor

Velociraptor: the Mitch Hedberg of dinosaurs. .

Disgusting Super Bowl Commercial Of The Day

Be sure to turn up the volume for full effect.

News: Zoo Escape Drill Features Employee In Zebra Costume

From the Mirror (UK). Zookeeper dresses as zebra for hilarious animal escape drill at Japanese zoo Staff at a zoo in Japan have taken part...

January Found Porn Roundup

Thanks, Chris, Rich Girl Red, Rachael P., Rachel H., Daisy, Laura, Karen, Kushibo, and Amy. That's a myth, you know. "Hey man, I...

News: Woman Tries To Kill Husband By Poisoning Own Genitals

Sounds fishy but it's from a newspaper so it must be true. From The Mirror. Oral sex assassination plot: Woman accused of putting pois...

January Motivational Poster Roundup

Happy Friday, cupcakes!