Job Query Of The Day: I Would Like To Be Pope

From McSweeney's.


I Would Like to Be Pope

by John Ortved


Dear sir or madam,

I am writing to apply for the position of Pope. I recently received my Bachelor of Arts, or “artium baccalaureus,” from Dartmouth College, with a major concentration in Theatre Studies and a minor concentration in Computer Science. While I have been focusing on the technology and financial sectors, I have